Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
