Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
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