my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Randomize
