He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
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