I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Bring me that man meat
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
