at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Is Oprah even human
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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