yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
