you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize
