what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
