shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize