Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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