can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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