Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
so that wasnt chicken after all
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
