So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
