It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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