I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
