It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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