allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
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I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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