Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize