hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Randomize
