...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
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Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
is it fun? or sober?
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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