a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
do nipples grow back?
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize