So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Randomize