This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
I faked an abortion last night.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
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