Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Randomize
