i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Randomize
