She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
