I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize