i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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