You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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