Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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