I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
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