I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
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