Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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