actually, I'm a sock model
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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