Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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