Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
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