please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize