The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize