So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
it was like eating out sand paper
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
