I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
