He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
