Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
My balls are so social today.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
