I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
