my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
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