Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
