I just cut my nipple shaving
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize