so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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