it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Randomize
