she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Randomize
