I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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