no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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