forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
